Top Ten Signs Your Kid's School Is Too Crowded
10. Kid comes home happy saying, "I got to ride inside the bus today!"
9. Principal sends you a warning -- he's not skipping class enough
8. Teacher needs a U-Haul to bring home the book reports
7. Losing 60 to 70 kids on class trip is considered "successful"
6. School play is "The Ten Commandments"--there are enough kids to play all 100,000 Hebrews
5. Class photo taken using government weather satellite
4. The teacher calls out, "Gus Van Rauschenbach" and 17 kids say, "Here"
3. Last spring's school bake sale brought in one and a quarter million
2. There's a waiting list to get your ass kicked by the school bully
1. The kids actually outnumber the roaches.