A man wandered into a bar one day. He had the world around his neck, and he was looking to crawl into a whisky bottle and stay there. After a couple of doubles, he slowed down a little, and looked up. He had half heard the piano playing, but had not realised who was playing it...
There, on a table, was a tiny piano, with a tiny piano player to match; no more than a foot tall. Forgetting his own problems, he wandered over and stood spellbound until the music stopped. Then, shaking his head in disbelief, he returned to the bar and called the barman
"Hey, where did you get that piano player?" he asked, and got back a poisoned glare.
"Aw, c'mon, there has to be a story here.."
"There is," says the barman "and I'm sick of telling it. I was down on the beach one day, and I shuffled into the sand to get more comfortable. Place was full of rubbish and I turned up this old brass lamp. I rubbed it, thinking there might be a date or inscription or something. Anyway, out comes this cloud of smoke and a Genie appears... you know, turban, scimitar ... the whole works. And he tells me I've got just one wish."
"Well? what did you wish for?"
"I'll tell you this," snarled the barman " I did not wish for a 12 inch pianist"