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" Two atoms were walking down the street. One atom says to the other one, "I've lost an electron! The 2nd atom replies, "Are you sure?" Says the 1st atom, "I'm positive." "
Anonymous


Verra Quiet

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Irish Hijinks

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Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye went to study at an English university and was living in the hall of residence with all the other students there. After he had been there for a month, his mother came to visit him (no doubt carrying reinforcements of tatties, salt herring, oatmeal and whisky).

"And how do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked.

"Mother," he replied, "they're such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head on the wall and won't stop. The one on the other side screams and screams all night."

"Oh Donald! How do you manage to put up with these awful noisy English neighbours?"

"Mother, I do nothing. I just ignore them. I just stay here verra quietly, playing my bagpipes."
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