" Newsflash! John Howard's library burned down on the weekend and two books, amongst other personal belongings, were destroyed! The real tragedy was that he hadn't finished colouring in one of them. "
Thursday, 27 March 2003 08:45
Whether a man winds up with the nest egg or a goose egg depends a lot on the kind of chick he marries.
Trouble in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earnin' his salt that he forgets his sugar.
Too many couples marry for better or for worse, but not for good.
When a man marries a woman, they become one, but the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
If a man has enough "horse sense" to treat his wife like a thoroughbred, she will never be an old nag.
On anniversaries the wise husband always forgets the past...but never the present.
A foolish husband remarks to his wife: "Honey, you stick to the washin', ironin', cookin', and scrubbin'. No wife of mine is gonna work.
The bonds of matrimony are a good investment only when the interest is kept up.
Many girls like to marry a military man--he can cook, sew, make bed, and isin good health...and he's already used to taking orders.
Grandpappy and his wife were discussin' their 50th wedding anniversary when she said, "Shall I kill a turkey tonight?"
"Naw, said Grandpappy, "Why blame a bird for something' that happened 50 years ago?"
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