" Jesus said to Peter, "Come forth and I will give you eternal glory." Peter came fifth and won a toaster. "
Wednesday, 06 September 2000 08:45
A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big burly man, tossed his pants to his bride and said, "here put these on."
She put them on, and the waist was twice the size of her body. "I can't wear your pants," she said.
"That's right!!" , said the husband, "and don't you forget it. I'm the man who wears the pants in this family!"
With that she flipped him her panties and said, "try these on."
He tried them on and found he could only get them on as far as his kneecap. He said, "hell, I can't get into your panties!"
She said, "that's right, and that's the way it's going to be until your goddamn attitude changes!"
Miss Ozzie said:
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