My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.
- Rita Rudner
Jokes
Polish Sausage
A man walks into a store and asks, "In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?"
The clerk looks at him and says, "I take it you’re Polish?"
The man, clearly offended, says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something, if I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?"
With deep self-righteous indignation, the man says, "Well, then why did you assume I’m Polish just because I asked for Polish sausage?"
"Because you’re at Hardware House."

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