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BABY - A hollow tube with a loud voice at one end and a complete lack of responsibility at the other end.

Jokes

Good, Bad and Worse

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Miscellaneous

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Good: Your wife is pregnant.
Bad: It's triplets.
Worse: You had a vasectomy five years ago.

Good: Your wife's not talking to you.
Bad: She wants a divorce.
Worse: She's a lawyer.

Good: Your son is finally maturing.
Bad: He's involved with the Woman next door.
Worse: So are you.

Good: Your son studies a lot in his room..
Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there.
Worse: You're in them.

Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids.
Bad: You can't find your birth control pills.
Worse: Your 13 year old daughter borrowed them.

Good: Your husband understands fashion.
Bad: He's a cross-dresser.
Ugly: He looks better than you.

Good: You give the "birds and bees" talk to your daughter.
Bad: She keeps interrupting.
Worse: With corrections.

Good: The postman's early.
Bad: He's wearing fatigues and carrying a shotgun.
Worse: You gave him nothing for Christmas.

Good: Your son is dating someone new.
Bad: It's another man.
Worse: He's your best friend.

Good: Your daughter got a new job.
Bad: As a hooker.
Worse: Your coworkers are her best clients.
The WORST: She makes more money than you do.
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