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My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.
- Rita Rudner

Jokes

Please Say Mass

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Religion

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A farmer named Mulldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with his pet dog, and when the dog died after many a year, Mulldoon went to mthe parish priest and he asked, "Father, my dog is dead. Could ya be sayin' a mass for the creature?"

Father Patrick replied, "I'm afraid not, we cannot have services for an animal in the church, but there's a new denomination down the road, no telling what they believe. Maybe they'll do somethin' for the creature."

Mulldoon said: "I'll go right away. Do ya think $50,000 is enough to donate for the service?"

Father Patrick exclaimed: "Glory be to God Mulldoon! Why didn't ya tell me the Dog was Catholic?!"
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