" 'Boy, I feel a lot safer now that Martha Stewart is behind bars. OJ Simpson and Kobe Bryant are still walking around; Osama Bin Laden too, but they take the ONE WOMAN in America willing to cook, clean, and work in the yard, and they haul her butt off to jail "
George Carlin

Run With Us

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One fine day Mister Rabbit goes running around the forest.

He sees a giraffe rolling a joint. "Giraffe, giraffe! Why do you do drugs? Come run with me instead!"

So the giraffe stops rolling his joint and runs with the rabbit.

Then they come across an elephant doing lines. Says the rabbit: "Elephant, elephant, why do you do drugs? Come run with us instead."

So the elephant stops and goes running with the two. Then they come across a lion preparing a syringe. "Lion, lion," cries the rabbit, "Why do you do drugs? Come run with us instead."

The lion, with a mighty roar, bangs the rabbit to smithereens.

"No!" the giraffe and the elephant cry. "Why did you do that? All he was trying to do was to help you out!"

The lion replied, "Damn rabbit always makes me run around the friggin' forest when he's on speed!"
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