Hello all and welcome to Ozjokes.com. I hope you enjoy browsing this huge collection of humour (or humor!). Our main emphasis is on Aussie Humour, unique to Australia. Where or how this sense of humour has evolved is a small mystery. Some say that it's from the incredible multicultural mix that is Australia. There is a huge database of all kinds of jokes to browse through and enjoy a good giggle, especially the "Pure Aussie" category. |
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Monday, 14 April 2008 |
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A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.
The
accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few
questions. He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and
then asks, "What's your occupation?"
"I'm a Lady of the night," she says.
The accountant is somewhat taken aback and says, "Let's try to rephrase that."
The woman says, "OK, I'm a high-end call girl".
"No, that still won't work. Try again."
They both think for a minute; then the woman says, "I'm an elite chicken farmer."
The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a prostitute?"
"Well, I raised a thousand little peckers last year."
The accountant says, "Chicken Farmer it is."
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Friday, 28 March 2008 |
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A man stood on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark
night in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling and no cars
passed. The storm was so strong, he could hardly see a few feet ahead
of him.
Suddenly he saw a car come towards him and stop. The guy,
without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door to realize
that nobody was behind the wheel. The car started slowly. The guy
looked at the road and saw a curve coming his way. Scared, he started
praying, and begged for his life. He hadn't come out of shock, when
just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and
moved the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand
appeared every time before a curve.
The guy gathered strength,
got out of the car and ran to the nearest town. Wet and in shock, he
ran into a cantina and asked for two shots of tequila, and started
telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through. A
silence enveloped everybody when they realized the guy was crying and
wasn't drunk.
About half an hour later, two guys walked into
the same cantina, and one said to the other. "Look Pepe, that's the
character who climbed into the car while we were pushing."
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