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Tuesday, 10 June 2003
For Top Ten Signs It's Too Cold for Golf

Even with Mr. Rogers in your group, you still don't feel warm and fuzzy

You have to wear the visor with the plaid, woolen ear flaps.

Your hands feel warmer when they touch a witch's tit.

Your cart sinks when it hits an iceberg.

It's hard to read a putt with icicles on your eyelashes

It drops below the temperature of an IRS agent's heart.

When you fell through the ice, you realized taking a divot on a frozen pond wasn't such a hot idea.

You're trapped by snow in the course's restaurant, ominously named the Donner Party Grill.

The greens are groomed by a Zamboni.

Your balls are blue



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