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I used to think I could pass gas silently until I got my hearing aid.

Jokes

Texan Commandments

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Religion

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People here in Texas have trouble with all those "shalls" and "shall nots" in the Ten Commandments.

Folks here just aren't used to talking in those terms. So, some folks out in west Texas got together and translated the "King James" into "King Ranch" language:

The Cowboy's Ten Commandments (posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie, Texas)

(1) Just one God.

(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.

(3) No tellin' tales or gossipin'.

(4) Git yourself to Sunday meetin'.

(5) Put nothin' before God.

(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.

(7) No killin.'

(8) Watch yer mouth.

(9) Don't take what ain't yers.

(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.

Now that's kinda plain an' simple, don't ya think? Y'all have a good day.
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